Act 1, Scene 9

MELI

There were a lot of apartments in Fede’s mind, and some of them were locked. While I was trying to lock-pick one of those, something important occurred to me: we had to tell our parents we were going to live together.

I know, very liberated feminist of you, Meli, but what you can’t picture is just how easily my family could un-liberate me in a flash, our surname being our surname.

No way around it.

Fede, as the ever-cute nerd, prepared himself with a curriculum of high society books like Great Expectations. Poor guy, he didn’t get that he wasn’t from here, he wasn’t one of us and he never would be in their eyes.

A car took us to the house in the Maria Luisa, which Fede told me reminded him of my head. Made sense, in a slightly unfortunate way for me.

Mom expected someone more in line with my exes, not a docile and mannered sort. Meanwhile Dad measured him from head to toe with his tiny shark eyes and gave him a strange hello: 

(Meli loves her impressions and will employ them constantly and swiftly throughout the play. Meli’s impression of her dad sounds like gravel and tobacco.)

(As Dad) “Good day, Fidel. I’ve been told all about you.”

Dad talked like that ‘cause he had been stabbed in the throat as a teen, you see.

So, that’s the way I found out Fede’s birth name and just how much he hated it, though he’d later claim he didn’t.

Dad then grilled for us, as he always did, and my mom figuratively grilled Fede.

(Meli’s impression of her mom is posh and shrill.)

(As Mom) “Young man, why did you decide to study business? Be honest, kindly.”

Mom asked Fede as we ate.

(The impression of Fede is unsure and overthought.)

(As Fede) “It’s… quite a lucrative career, Ma’am. I don’t think I have any reason beyond that.”

(As Mom) “That’s quite mercenary, only being in it for the money.”

(As Fede) “It’s not like that, not exactly. I’d be good at it, I’m sure, though I’m not sure if it interests me. I’m not sure anything interests me, for the moment. But with capital one can do anything. I guess I’ll just figure out what later.”

There was a sound like a choking boar. Fede had made Dad laugh.

            END OF SCENE